Yes my son is disabled, but I think he’s perfect as he is: Infamous hellraiser COLIN FARRELL reveals his boy James helped him get sober

As a parent who has walked the same path as Colin Farrell, I can deeply empathize with his desire to find a suitable home for his son James. The fear of losing control over their child’s future is a haunting specter that lingers in every parent’s mind.

Occasionally, when folks encounter Colin Farrell and his older son James outside of Colin’s residence in LA, they might approach him to inquire about any issues concerning the younger man.

Colin mentions, “I often share information about it, and if anyone is curious enough to inquire, I encourage them to ask. So, when someone asks me something like, ‘Is that your son, and what’s the situation?’ I respond by saying, ‘I’ll be happy to fill you in on what’s happening with him…’

The current situation with James Padraig Farrell, who is 21 years old and the son of Colin and his former partner Kim Bordenave (an American model), involves a condition called Angelman syndrome. This is a seldom-seen genetic disorder named after Dr. Harry Angelman, a British pediatrician who discovered it in 1965. The condition results in a cheerful disposition but significant intellectual and developmental impairments, with symptoms such as seizures and challenges with speech and movement. Sadly, the disorder is incurable, and Colin confirms that its effects are quite conspicuous.

‘He points out that we all face substantial challenges, and while they might primarily revolve around emotional or mental health issues – which are undeniably critical matters – it often seems as though no one is grappling with such difficulties when observing those around us. It’s only when someone like James enters the room that you can’t help but notice they have something special going on; these challenges, he emphasizes, are indeed significant.’

Prior to James’ arrival, Colin’s life appeared to be devoid of significant hurdles for the most part. He was a good-looking, charismatic, and carefree individual, known for his A-list acting career and love for alcohol and women. Despite being an iconic movie star, with recent accolades like 2022’s The Banshees Of Inisherin, which earned nine Oscar nominations, and currently shining in the title role of the hit TV series The Penguin, where he portrays Oswald ‘Oz’ Cobb, a once brutally disfigured mobster who transforms into a super-villain, Colin seemed to glide past the hardships that ordinary people encounter.

In thick makeup and prosthetics, Colin transformed nearly unrecognizably into The Penguin. He admitted that delving into the darker aspects of his mind to portray the character made for a difficult yet rewarding journey. “Let me clarify,” he shared with Total Film magazine, “I thoroughly enjoyed it. However, it had a profound impact on me… It wasn’t that I lost myself completely and started setting cars on fire, but it was an intense experience.

In 2003, James’ birth led Colin and Kim to believe that parenting would be straightforward. “We thought he was flawless,” Colin recalls, then swiftly amends his statement. “He truly is perfect, he’s a wonderful young man, but we believed he was not only physically but also neurologically flawless as well. Initially, he was misdiagnosed with cerebral palsy due to its similarities with Angelman syndrome. However, by the time he was two, he started having seizures, and I realized he had severe developmental delays.

Colin’s son’s struggles made him see life from a fresh perspective. Once, he shared with me, “You truly understand the value of everything when you’ve experienced challenges like these.” He confessed to feeling fear – remember the times we rushed through hospitals when James was having seizures? – but also a profound sense of love and admiration. He likened the significance of a child’s first steps for parents, to the immense importance of each step his son took, especially given the initial concerns about his ability to walk at all. These steps transcended ordinary meaning, entering a realm of their own.

Colin, who once admitted to consuming approximately three bottles of Jack Daniels, 12 bottles of red wine, and 60 pints of beer each week, alongside other substances, decided to quit alcohol and drugs. He explained, ‘James was just two when I got sober.’ He added, ‘One of the motivations that helped me break free from alcohol and drugs was realizing James had health issues. All children deserve a caregiver – whether it’s a parent, grandparent, or someone else – and through his own struggles, James taught me to find a reason within myself to want to live, even if initially it was more about my desire to stay alive for him.’

He tends not to discuss his younger son Henry, 15, who is the child of a former partner, Polish actress and singer Alicja Bachleda-Curús, extensively in public as he doesn’t feel he has much more to share. However, it’s evident that he cherishes both sons deeply. He expresses that his boys have educated him more than he could ever educate them. Although it may sound sentimental, this statement holds true for him. The man he is today owes a significant part of his character to his parents and upbringing, but also to the lessons and expectations set by his sons.

Today, I can’t help but express my admiration for none other than James! Colin couldn’t be prouder of him. This guy is not just physically strong and fearlessly brave, but also incredibly self-willed. His determination to master feats that most of us manage by age two or three is simply astounding. Yet, amidst all this strength and resilience, he’s a total charmer. He’s got a humor that’s as infectious as it is unexpected, and a playful cheekiness that makes him even more endearing. His smile could illuminate the entire city of Manhattan – it’s truly radiant, reflecting a spirit that’s not just captivating, but also a joy to be around.

Although communicating with James can be challenging since he’s non-verbal, I still engage with him in the same way I would speak to you, assuming he’s a fluent speaker of the King’s English. We have conversations, but I’m not convinced he has the level of understanding that some people claim. I hope I’m mistaken, as there is a great deal of shame associated with this belief. I strive to interact with him at the level I believe he’s capable, and I think he’s wonderful just the way he is.

Throughout James’s life, Colin and Kim have maintained a strong connection with each other. Now that James has turned 21, they feel it is appropriate for them to help him find a suitable place to reside, offering professional care.

He expresses, “Some parents prefer taking care of their child personally instead of placing them elsewhere. I understand their choice, but imagine this scenario: what if I suffer a heart attack tomorrow or Kim has an accident in a month? Then James would be left alone. He’d become a ward of the state and his fate would be uncertain. We wouldn’t have any control over where he ends up.

It seems likely that it would be overwhelming for James. I’ve known my son well, and he yearns for more than what we can currently offer him at home. He seeks a broader life – one filled with connections, social interactions, and experiences beyond our immediate surroundings. He desires the freedom to go out daily, visit the supermarket, the beach, museums, cinemas, and other places that foster a sense of community. In essence, he’s ready for a connected life, far more extensive than what we can provide financially at this moment.

The shocking absence of adequate resources sparked his and Kim’s horror, leading him to establish the Colin Farrell Foundation – a charitable organization aimed at assisting families with loved ones having intellectual disabilities.

Finding appropriate residential care for James has been a challenging journey for us. It made me think: ‘If I’m having these difficulties, what must it be like for other families who don’t have the resources I do?’ I’ve always wanted to address this issue, but my focus has been on raising my children. Now that I have more time, I feel ready to take action.

One of our initial moves involves hosting a glamorous event, often referred to as a gala, graced by some of Colin’s well-known Hollywood friends on December 7 in Chicago. This will serve as our public debut within the community, with many community members and generous donors expected to attend. In February, I plan to address the press in Washington, D.C., and I also have appointments scheduled with a few senators who have extended their kindness by reaching out to us.

Would he care to divulge the political leanings of those senators? No, he would not. ‘I don’t give a f*** whether they’re Republican or Democrat because I’m neither – I won’t be cast as anything politically. Someone said to me about one senator, “But he’s a Republican.” I said, “Are you joking me?” None of this is about Republican or Democrat or liberal or conservative. This is about doing the right thing by our children.’

Gabrielle Donnelly

The Penguin, Monday, 9pm, Sky Atlantic and Now.

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2024-10-18 14:09