REAL story of Mamie Fish and her Primate Prince whose parties horrified Gilded Age America… and were even too wild for HBO’s new hit series

Mamie Fish was no great beauty. Nor was she especially rich or well educated.

However, while she might not have had much wealth or traditional beauty, she more than compensated with her boundless creativity. Her humor, too, was unmistakable – a fact that perhaps didn’t shine through in all of those photos where she appeared to be frowning seriously at the camera.

It was these abilities that enabled her to establish herself as the vibrant and lively heart, figuratively speaking, of New York’s Gilded Age social gatherings.

Mamie’s invitations were highly sought after social events in town, attracting not only the prominent Astors and Vanderbilt families but also renowned figures like Oscar Wilde and Sarah Bernhardt. The appeal was so strong that people would attend these extravagant, cost-no-object gatherings, sometimes even avoiding being hit by lightbulbs playfully thrown by an intoxicated monkey.

In the late 19th century, which was not typically known for this, Mamie (portrayed by Ashlie Atkinson in HBO’s The Gilded Age) enjoyed a marriage based on love. Moreover, her wealthy spouse was eager to ensure her contentment at all costs.

In the year 1853, Marion Graves Anthon, later known as Mamie, hailed from a prosperous family in New York City. However, by the time she turned 22 years old, her father had passed away, necessitating a relocation from their lavish Manhattan residence.

At that particular point in time, they moved to Astoria, Queens, which was primarily recognized for its oil refineries and the unpleasant odor they produced, often compared to a “sewer wall.

In order for her family to climb out of their current tough situation, Mamie felt she needed to find a highly advantageous marriage, but some weren’t optimistic about it.

Luckily for me, she managed to capture the attention of none other than Stuyvesant Fish, a boy I’d known since we were kids, who seemed to have been born holding a massive silver spoon that could easily pass for a soup ladle. Fish was utterly smitten by her – and she returned his affections with equal enthusiasm.

Having spent an evening together, she reached out to let him know that he hadn’t remembered to deliver flowers the next day. However, there was no need for concern as one of his friends had taken care of it instead.

He never forgot again, and the pair soon married.

Stuyvesant deeply cherished his amusing spouse, and one acquaintance of the pair, the wealthy social observer Elizabeth Drexel, asserted that he resembled a valiant knight ‘ready to charge into conflict upon her slightest command.’

On one occasion, upon noticing her coughing on a porch, he inquired if there was anything he could fetch for her sore throat. Instead, she proposed a beautiful diamond necklace.

However, some people didn’t appreciate Mamie’s carefree attitude, nor her habit of vocalizing displeasure towards the refined entertainment of that time.

She found the extended operas that people frequently enjoyed attending exceedingly dull compared to anything she had ever experienced in terms of boredom. Instead, she favored the lively antics of PT Barnum’s circus, and they motivated her to host lavish parties of her own.

At first, her social appearances drew criticism from prominent figures such as Ward McAllister, a character portrayed by Nathan Lane in the HBO show, who maintained a list of the 400 most significant individuals in New York high society.

McAllister found one of her initial creations, “A Duck Pond Dinner,” particularly disturbing. During this event, she placed a large tub of water right in the middle of the dining table. Instead of just serving ducks, live ducks were also present, entertaining the guests as they swam around.

McAllister strongly disapproved of a dining table adorned with more than a single bouquet of flowers. He found her extravagance so distasteful that he publicly criticized her social conduct, warning other high-society hosts and hostesses that she was extremely uncouth.

Unphased, Mamie boldly confronted her adversary, as reported by the Dixon Evening Telegraph, and immersed herself completely in high society.

In no time, she purchased a home in Newport, deciding there to host the most extraordinary, unparalleled parties that America had yet to witness.

Historically, social gatherings or parties weren’t a significant part of American culture due to several factors. One reason can be attributed to the influence of the Puritans, but more significantly, it was due to the vast size of the country. Most early Americans resided in rural areas, which meant they lived far from their neighbors, making it challenging to travel for socializing at each other’s homes.

Contrastingly, whereas nearly 94% of Americans resided in rural areas at the turn of the 19th century, by its conclusion, an impressive 40% had shifted to urban living. Attending numerous social gatherings within a week was no longer unthinkable; instead, it became quite appealing, given the scarcity of home entertainment options during that era.

However, the events that many people, including the affluent, were attending were rather uneventful. One woman, speaking about one of Mrs Astor’s prestigious parties, stated: ‘I was utterly bored. I entertained myself by ranking the people at my table based on their dullness, with one representing the utmost boredom – and few guests scored higher than three.’

Instead of prolonging dinners for hours as guests were used to, Mamie decided to shorten them to just an hour. Moreover, she aimed to offer entertainment that went beyond simple conversations among diners.

Initially, it seems she might have rushed things a tad bit. For instance, at a dinner with eight courses that was over in just half an hour, diners were visibly hurried, even gripping their plates tightly to prevent the waitstaff from clearing them almost immediately after placing them on the table.

According to The Pittsburgh Press, Mrs. Astor was known for her grace and formal events, while Mrs. Fish was more lively and often hosted unorthodox soirees.

Among the dishes she served was her well-known recipe, Dog’s Dinner. When a man remarked to Mamie that women seemed to prefer dogs over men, she playfully suggested she might adjust her meal plans to accommodate this supposed preference.

Women, accompanied by their pets, received invitations. For this special event, the dogs donned their best attire, even Mamie’s own pet wore a collar adorned with diamonds.

The meal was just as elegant as if served to humans, featuring candles, waiters, and a gourmet selection that included rice, stewed liver, fricassee, and dog treats.

One dog was so well fed he passed out on his plate and had to be carried home in his owner’s arms.

He might not have seen the most exciting part of the event, as it involved allowing dogs to freely chase after some cats.

Moreover, it wasn’t just this event that earned Mamie a reputation for animal-themed parties. The one she is particularly renowned for took place in 1902, celebrating the arrival of Prince Del Drago, which might have been her most famous.

At the peak of my Newport community’s infatuation with aristocracy, affluent mothers were eagerly seeking to marry their daughters off to European nobles, essentially using their newly-acquired American wealth as a ticket. A popular tune of the time aptly expressed this trend: ‘Money talks, and it can buy/Undoubtedly, a lofty class of noblemen.’

At the time, everyone in high society Newport was eagerly anticipating Mamie’s party for the supposed Prince Del Drago. However, upon arrival, they were surprised to find that their eligible royal guest was none other than a monkey dressed in a miniature tuxedo.

Remarkably, the monkey displayed exceptional behavior. Not only did it eat using a fork and knife, but its manners were comparable to those of certain princes I’ve encountered, as Elizabeth Drexel put it.

Yet, his well-mannered actions started to deteriorate significantly once they gave him champagne, causing him to leap from the chandelier, snatching light bulbs and hurling them towards the attendees instead.

Most seemed to agree that it was still much more fun than dinners with an actual aristocrat.

At the Valentine’s event that Mamie organized, youngsters played the role of Cupid, flitting around the gathering while delivering messages penned by guests to each other. When they felt like a break from delivering love letters, they could enjoy a dance troupe Mamie had hired, featuring ballerinas whose skirts sparkled with tiny electric lights.

At another event, they held a Mardi Gras Ball with a themed area called “Satanic Flower Garden.” In this section, the flowers were creatively shaped like flames, and attendees received pitchforks as souvenirs to take home.

During the yearly Harvest Ball, attendees were asked to don farmer attire, dined at lengthy wooden tables, and admired Mamie’s residence adorned with scarecrows, haystacks, and countless sunflowers.

Oh, the thrill of the Mirrored Moves event still sends a shiver down my spine! I was absolutely captivated when the organizer proclaimed, “Let’s make it appear as if we’ve got our heads spinning backwards!” Indeed, that night, every dance enthusiast donned their garments in reverse, adding an extraordinary twist to the usual spectacle.

In my zeal to honor my freshly acquired dwelling, I transformed it into an old-timey variety theater, complete with a stage for performance. The act that unfolded there, precursor to today’s roasts on Comedy Central, delicately poked fun at our esteemed guests, centuries before their time.

Later on, they enjoyed a performance featuring a dancing pony, trained canines, comedic clowns, and agile acrobats. An elephant was also present at the event.

Events such as these solidified Mamie’s reputation for centuries to come, as an entertainer who infused not just sophistication, but also spark and wit into the social gathering scene of America.

So, next time you go to a themed party, don’t forget you have Mamie Fish to thank.

 

Jennifer Wright’s book titled ‘Glitz, Glam, and a Damn Good Time’ is set for release on August 5th, under the publishing house Grand Central Publishing.

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2025-06-22 23:49

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