Nobody Wants This Mean-Spirited Depiction of Jewish Women in Nobody Wants This

As a Jewish woman myself, I found “Nobody Wants This” to be a disappointing and frustrating portrayal of my community. The show seems to rely heavily on tired stereotypes and cheap jokes about Jewish women that don’t feel authentic or nuanced.

In a captivating twist, the new Netflix series “Nobody Wants This ” caught my interest with an intriguing premise: “Adam Brody portrays a charismatic Rabbi.” Indeed, when I finally watched the 10-episode romantic comedy, the former star of “The O.C. ” delivered on his promise in the role of Rabbi Noah Roklov. He seems almost unchanged from his days as Seth Cohen in the early 2000s, maintaining an endearing charm through his self-effacing acting skills that he has honed over years in television.

Even though I had hoped for an enjoyable romantic comedy, I ended up feeling disappointed. The series Noah presents the illusion of the perfect Jewish male character, but it appears to harbor a strong dislike towards Jewish women. They are depicted as constant complainers, shrews, and the main antagonists in this narrative. Instead of being carried away by romance, I encountered the harsh truth that perhaps this show holds a grudge against me.

This creation is the brainchild of Erin Foster, a woman whose life has been intertwined with the entertainment industry since her father, David Foster, is a renowned music producer. She was once a cast member on the short-lived VH1 reality show, “Barely Famous,” where she and her sister Sara portrayed fictionalized versions of themselves in their quest for fame. In reality, Erin converted to Judaism to marry entertainment executive Simon Tikhman, an event that was featured in Vogue. Now, under a different persona named Joanne, played by Kristen Bell, she shares her story with a twist. Similar to Foster, Joanne has a podcast with her sister Morgan, who is known for her role in “Succession,” where they candidly discuss their tumultuous romantic relationships and questionable choices in men.

At a social gathering, Joanne encounters Noah following an initial misunderstanding where she assumed a man with more typical Jewish features was the rabbi she anticipated meeting. Although their first encounter unintentionally involved a hint of prejudice, Noah develops feelings for this vivacious woman of small stature. However, his role as a rabbi adds complexity to their relationship: He is traditionally expected to marry a Jewish woman, and Joanne, with her fair complexion, is not Jewish at all. In fact, she’s almost astonishingly ignorant about even the most fundamental Jewish traditions, considering her upbringing in affluent Los Angeles. For example, Joanne doesn’t recognize the meaning of “Shalom,” a term commonly used among Jewish communities. Growing up within the same L.A. circles, I too would have attended numerous bat mitzvahs with a person like Joanne.

In order to be with Noah, Joanne needs to conquer her personal doubts regarding relationships. For Noah to be with Joanne, he must find a way to balance his career, faith, and choice of partner. However, they face opposition from a group of judgmental Jewish women, including Noah’s mother Bina (played by Tovah Feldshuh), sister-in-law Esther (Jackie Tohn), and ex Rebecca (Emily Arlook). Although Joanne is far from flawless—she can be childish and disorganized—these dark-haired women are one-dimensional caricatures that perpetuate stereotypes. They are clingy, domineering, and cruel.

The non-Jewish woman—a.k.a. the “shiksa”—has long been idolized by Jewish men in popular culture. In Annie Hall, Woody Allen’s Alvy Singer falls for the title character played by Diane Keaton, who tells him, “you’re what Grammie Hall would call a real Jew.” In Elaine May’s The Heartbreak Kid, Charles Grodin’s Lenny Cantrow essentially abandons his Jewish newlywed Lila Kolodny (Jeannie Berlin) to chase after Cybill Shepherd on a beach. In the musical The Last Five Years, which will be on Broadway next year more than two decades after its off-Broadway premiere, novelist Jamie sings an ode to his “shiksa goddess,” Cathy. “I’m breaking my mother’s heart,” he croons. “The longer I stand looking at you the more I hear it splinter and crack from 90 miles away.” 

Instead of “Nobody Wants This,” let’s consider “From the Shiksa’s Point of View.” In this narrative, the shiksa, much like her Jewish partner, is deeply in love. However, she isn’t eager to embrace his culture wholeheartedly. Why would she? It seems rather unwelcoming to her.

In the closing moments of the pilot episode, Esther wonders aloud to Bina, “Who on earth is that?” referring to Joanne who unexpectedly turned up at Noah’s temple during his sermon. Bina reacts angrily, calling her “a shiksa.” As the scene unfolds, Esther accompanies Noah and his brother Sasha (from Veep) to a bar where they were with Joanne and Morgan. Esther signals her husband to join her in the car by honking and labeling the sisters as “number one and number two harlots.” Meanwhile, Bina, who has a thick Eastern European accent, appears menacing when she scolds her son for dating Joanne. Later, when they meet, Bina initially seems endearing towards Joanne but then leans in with a smile and warns her, “You’ll never be with my son,” in a manner reminiscent of a mob boss.

In addition to Rebecca, other Jewish women in the story “Nobody Wants This” are also subjected to negative portrayals. Rebecca appears less abrasive and genuinely seems sorrowful, but she’s still depicted unfavorably. Noah ends their relationship after she prematurely begins wearing an engagement ring without his proposal. Later, she deceives Morgan, a woman she meets at a bar, about the state of her relationship with Noah, intending to inflict pain on Joanne. Furthermore, the female partners of Noah’s basketball team, known as the Matzah Ballers, are portrayed as shallow admirers of Esther, either fixated on their weddings, children, or garish jewelry brands.

All the characters in this story can be seen as a type of Jewish American woman, often humorously referred to as JAPs. A TV show called “Crazy Ex-Girlfriend” even had a funny skit about this. However, “Nobody Wants This” doesn’t have the authenticity that makes the “Crazy Ex” scene relatable and amusing. Instead, it offers a superficial portrayal of Judaism from an outsider’s perspective. The only character who is entirely positive is a rabbi played by Leslie Grossman, whom Joanne meets at the camp where Noah works.

This statement does not challenge Foster’s conversion to Judaism. However, it does not excuse her use of stereotypes for flimsy humor, as opposed to providing deeper, complex portrayals of women. Joanne and Morgan can be both misguided yet lovable, while their adversaries are merely depicted as unkind.

The men, it’s worth noting, come across as exceptionally laid-back. Sasha is a lively character who shares a common ground with Morgan as the “less fortunate siblings.” Sasha and Noah’s father (Paul Ben-Victor) enjoys relaxing in the sauna and taking naps. It’s understandable why Joanne might find the appeal of marrying a Jewish man; it’s also clear why she may have reservations about converting to Judaism.

The disappointing conclusion of “Nobody Wants This” is that it fails to deliver a positive portrayal of a woman’s immersion into Jewish culture. Instead, it reinforces harmful stereotypes about Jewish women. I expected to find something endearing, but instead felt singled out. And no, my criticism isn’t just because the character’s name is Esther. I swear.

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2024-09-26 12:06