Kraven the Hunter review: Put it out of its misery

As a longtime comic book enthusiast who has seen more than my fair share of superhero movies, I must say that the latest addition to the Sony Pictures Universe of Spider-Man Characters, “Kraven the Hunter,” left me feeling like I had just finished a disappointing meal at a restaurant with a promising menu.

Regarding the review you may encounter, Sony Pictures made an exceptional choice in casting Aaron Taylor-Johnson as Kraven the Hunter, a role that was perfectly suited to him. He portrayed the character with a visceral intensity, believability, and power that truly captured the essence of the Marvel Comics big game hunter. Unfortunately, the rest of the film seemed to hinder his performance, making it seem like he was trying to avoid stepping in water buffalo droppings throughout the movie.

Did it really have that many problems? Well, let’s get into it and find out.

On with the show…

SPOILERS AHEAD – NOT THAT IT MATTERS – SPOILERS AHEAD

Opting for a different scenario might have been more straightforward and perhaps more compassionate if a brief Instagram reel showcasing the movie’s cast setting fire to $110 million could be shared. In under a minute, it would spread across the country, conveying the impact of funding the film “Kraven” as effectively as the actual event would have done.

Before the movie’s release, news outlets announced that the Sony Spider-Man Universe has, in fact, ceased to exist. Would you still pay $20 for tickets if there’s no post-credits scene? (No, I’m not joking… the lights come on when the credits finish.) Is that something you’d want to lead with? Why bother watching the film at all?!

This announcement feels like pulling off a Band-Aid, the one your quirky uncle wears on his Winnie the Pooh-like arm. It’s a swift, abrupt tear! And, unfortunately, there won’t be any sympathy here. If you spent $60 at the movies, hoping for a hint or Easter Egg regarding ‘The Sinister Six’, I regret to inform you that it won’t materialize.

The Spider-Man villains won’t have a family reunion gathering.

All growl. No bite. But there were some gums.

It’s surprising that Kraven, rather than being part of the Sinister Six build-up, ended up being the one to foil it in the movie. The trailer hinted at this fast-paced continuity. Among Marvel-influenced films, this one was particularly gruesome, perhaps even surpassing films like The Punisher, Blade, Deadpool, or No Way Home in terms of violence and intensity. That aspect definitely lived up to expectations.

As a gamer, I can say that Kraven’s game is all about the action and the thrill. The fights are intense, the tools and weapons are ingenious, and the superhuman feats he performs leave me breathless. And let’s not forget those abs – they could shred cheese!

As a fanatic, I’ve always been intrigued by Sergei Kravinoff’s character from the comics. In the heart of Africa, the Belgian Congo, he earned his legendary status as an unmatched big game hunter. There, he stumbled upon a witch doctor’s magical concoction, bravely drank it, and was astounded to find himself endowed with the raw power of the jungle. This enchanting brew was concocted from mutagenic substances, granting him superhuman abilities. In this movie adaptation, his powers are akin to the blazing speed of a cheetah, the fierce aggression of a lion, the agile prowess of a panther, and the skillful dexterity of a circus bear.

Regarding the trailer: The sole mutant was a massive lion, oozing malevolent fluid into an exposed wound. We zero in on this detail, but then Calypso observes the lion attacking Sergei brutally (though it could be debated that the large cat was frightened and saved Sergei as it turns out). She forces some of this substance down Sergei’s throat, which, combined with the lion’s genetic material, results in Super Sergei.

It seems Marvel has previously depicted characters who gained powers from using plants, such as Bushmaster in “Luke Cage.” However, Sony Pictures apparently finds such a concept unappealingly ordinary. Instead, this film features a grumpy lion expelling blood from its wound, which suggests an unnecessary and problematic complexity in the plot. If only the movie didn’t require a storyline, as it is those elements that have led us on a perilous journey into the wilderness of convoluted narratives.

The elephants – or Rhinos – in the room

Just as a jungle may seem serene yet is filled with hidden pitfalls, Kraven the Hunter concealed numerous weaknesses that, at first glance, appeared innocuous. It takes but a gentle breeze to rustle some leaves and expose these flaws, however, once revealed, they can trip one up just as easily as a fragile twig snaps underfoot.

The film starts by showcasing Kraven’s tricky, dangerous acrobatics on buildings, reminiscent of Spider-Man. However, some moments featuring awkward post-production editing techniques are noticeable, almost as if they were taught at a low-budget Russian martial arts school. Despite the movie having access to American Ninja Warrior stunt performers, it seems to struggle with correcting poor voiceovers and mismatched tones in dialogue, perhaps due to budget constraints.

The movie version of Calypso’s background has been significantly altered. It seems as if Sony Pictures is underestimating comic book enthusiasts, believing they won’t notice the differences. Originally, Calypso Ezili was a sorceress who debuted in Kraven’s story in 1963’s The Amazing Spider-Man No. 209. She was actually raised in Haiti, but in this portrayal, she hails from Ghana instead.

Kraven’s resurrection was not due to lion saliva and an antique Tarot card; it was black magic that brought him back from the dead. Ariana DeBose has earned an Oscar, and she could have convincingly portrayed a Haitian voodoo priestess rather than a lawyer with an American accent who spent winter in West Africa. In the film adaptation of Kraven’s origin story, Calypso played a significant role, but her character was far richer and more complex than what was shown in J.C. Chandor’s film. For example, 16 years after Kraven drank Calypso’s magical potion, they cross paths at a funeral. He presents the card to prove his identity. Frankly, I lose my keys twice a week, but this man wouldn’t let a Tarot card bend after a year and a half. Correct.

To clarify, we have the character “Chameleon” or “Dmitri Smerdyakov (Fred Hechinger),” who is Kraven’s half-brother in this movie. Besides contributing to the final two minutes of shape-shifting scenes, he gained attention by impersonating Harry Styles, Tony Bennett, and Ozzy Osbourne. (What a terrific soundtrack indeed! Oh my!) In the comics, Dmitri the Chameleon is similar to Bruce Willis’ “Jackal.” Notably, the same bone-shrinking technology employed on Chris Evans was utilized to give Hechinger an impressive transformation.

He is a master impersonator who can change his appearance like a Skrull in a plastic surgeon’s office. He was cunning, intelligent, and loved revenge. In the film, Dmitri is close to a spineless jellyfish and never holds a grudge that Aleksei Sytsevich/Rhino (Alessandro Nivola) cut off his finger for a mailed gift to his bloodthirsty and billionaire Russian arms dealer daddy, Nikolai Kravinoff (Russell Crowe).

Without a doubt, throughout the film, Rhino is often seen carrying an appealing backpack filled with his human serum. It seems someone should advise him to let go of his grudge. Interestingly, he hunts alongside Nikolai, who publicly humiliates him in front of other poachers, which explains why Rhino holds a grudge against the Kravinoff family for 16 years later. Lastly, I must express my disappointment with the portrayal of Rhino in “The Amazing Spider-Man 2.” It would be great if someone could contact the movie and suggest that they create Rhino more like this, instead of some hastily assembled Transformer with parts from Walmart. Poor Paul Giamatti.

“Old Yeller” the Beast

The main issue lies with the portrayal of Kraven the Hunter, as Sony Pictures seem to be overloading a film with less prominent characters such as Tier 2 or 3 figures. Given that this is supposedly the final film, Kraven deserved a more substantial plot with well-developed character arcs and origins. It appears as though they’re trying to squeeze in as many characters from Spider-Man’s rogues gallery as possible before they “spoil,” so to speak.

You know? The winning model from Venom: The Last Dance.

Instead of a symphony reaching its climax to introduce the Sinister Six, we experience an unpleasant chaos resembling a collection of flatulent noises. Despite each character striving for significance, only Kraven truly earns it. This is why this expansive cinematic series fell short – it lacked a unifying goal. There was no interconnected narrative, just loose threads thrown together, which even an enthusiastic cat on catnip could tangle haphazardly.

J.C. Chandor has a knack for crafting excellent films (such as Triple Frontier and A Most Violent Year). Similarly, Russell Crowe, Aaron Taylor-Johnson, and Ariana DeBose possess the ability to star in top-notch movies. The lead casting was remarkably convincing, especially with those impressive abs (I apologize for the repetition, but they were truly a sight to behold). Richard Wenk demonstrates skill in creating captivating narratives, as seen in the Equalizer franchise. With Marvel Entertainment’s support, Sony Pictures had the potential to turn this project into something extraordinary. However, it seems that this endeavor fell prey to its own constituents. Can you enlighten me on why this project suffered due to its collective elements?

Indifference. To put it simply, even while Morbius darted away from bullets, the Sony Pictures Universe of Spider-Man Characters seemed to lose interest in crafting compelling characters and instead focused on cashing in. Regrettably for those anticipating that Kraven the Hunter might exhibit a positive spirit or aim for greater heights (including myself), this cash transaction failed.

RATING: 3/10 (And Aaron Taylor-Johnson is 2.5 of that.)

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2024-12-13 23:01