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Celebrity dating app Raya’s clients are a deadly secret kept by the elites. But I managed to infiltrate it… and you’ll never guess which A-listers popped up

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I wasn’t anticipating finding something as valuable as gold so quickly, but there on my phone screen was a picture of one of the most famous and attractive comedic actors in the world – none other than Owen Wilson himself, with his golden hair shining brightly and that irresistible smile that graces every movie poster.

To put it simply, was I interested in dating him? Considering I would need to move to the U.S., leave my kids behind, and find a caretaker for my cats… yes, indeed I did. I gave a ‘like’ and continued scrolling through the impressive lineup of men, each boasting Michelin-starred qualities.

Living in Raya, often feels like a surreal dream, but it’s the everyday existence for its members, including the renowned actor David Harbour from Stranger Things, who is said to have hidden a profile on this so-called ‘celebrity dating app‘.

Despite my initial enthusiasm, the Raya experience ultimately left me feeling deeply disappointed. Following our separation four years ago, I was eager to embark on a fresh romantic journey. For quite some time, we had been living separately, with no shared bedroom or intimate moments to speak of.

In my mid-forties, financially secure and holding a stylish PR position, I frequently traveled between the Cotswolds and London. On a scale of ten, I’d rate myself as seven or eight. Confident about dating, I felt quite smug and eagerly looked forward to joining Raya, a popular destination for affluent divorcees in the social sphere.

Among those who have been known to use it are singer John Mayer, actors Ben Affleck, Paul Mescal, Chris Rock, and Owen Wilson (three of these notable figures ended up appearing on my feed). My friends, chuckling over cocktails at the local club for members, urged me to join, claiming it was a must.

To be honest, navigating this process wasn’t as simple as I had initially thought. You see, it’s whispered that out of every 12 applicants, only one makes the cut, leaving a staggering 100,000 hopefuls waiting patiently on a seemingly endless list for their turn – a heartrending tale indeed.

However, let’s give this a shot, regardless! I provided essential information about me, including my Instagram username, and listed a few references – friends who are already part of it. A hint of excitement crossed my face as I looked forward to potential celebrity encounters.

Raya replied, “Not just yet.” She found herself added to the disliked waitlist, which she spent an unfortunate half-year brooding over. Luckily, it’s often reassessed – and when at long last, I received a message saying I had been accepted, approximately a year ago, I was filled with joy.

For a temporary stint, let me express candidly: If you don’t genuinely feel like a youthful replica of Angelina Jolie (though it’s been speculated that Brad Pitt once used the app, but there was no concrete proof), it’s quite possible that Raya might leave you feeling less than confident.

From what little I’ve observed, many women appear to be younger, more attractive, and more accomplished than the vast majority of women I am acquainted with, and they often heavily edit their images. However, I choose not to manipulate my photos or misrepresent my age because I see no purpose in it.

On Raya, the platform operates similarly to a regular dating app, leveraging an algorithm that considers factors such as profession, preferences, and shared interests. This means that potential matches’ profiles will appear for you to explore, with the option to express interest and wait for a mutual liking, or choose not to pursue them.

You’re not permitted to take screenshots, as it will trigger an immediate warning. However, I was profoundly disappointed by my success rate – I didn’t get even one match per day – which is quite contrasting to apps like Hinge, where it seems that being ‘aware’ or ‘sentient’ is highly valued, and despite having a largely inactive account, I still receive multiple daily notifications of virtual red rose ‘likes’ from men who are either younger or older than me.

On Raya, I didn’t seem to attract much attention. This lackluster reaction left me feeling like an outsider looking in, as if I were on the outskirts of the popular group, where everyone else appeared to be enjoying themselves, while I felt outdated and dull, which isn’t entirely far from reality.

For the standard membership, which costs £19.99 per month, you can only see approximately 25 profiles simultaneously. If someone catches your eye, they must also express interest for us to be matched, and the same goes for them. Ideally, we would then communicate. This occurred on occasion, but it was mostly just a confidence booster (not saying this about the Italian erotic artist, by the way), because I wasn’t sure what the next step should be.

The majority of the men were located in the U.S., while only a handful were in the U.K. Surprisingly, very few were close to my location. To add to that, I have a school run coming up. It seems challenging to arrange a dinner in London and collect the PE kit at the same time, don’t you think?

Most men had an impressively attractive appearance, with a few exceptions that were evidently rich or highly accomplished.

In most cases, their professions leaned towards finance or film production, and their profile pictures generally adhered to an alpha male stereotype. One image showed him diving from a yacht, another displayed him speaking publicly, or skiing, or with a gang of male companions. Many of them were so well-groomed that they seemed like potential serial killers – reminiscent of Christian Bale in American Psycho.

Discovering how surprisingly small the world can be (and it’s amazing that David Harbour was able to keep a low profile), I unexpectedly ran into several familiar faces: two ex-husbands of friends and an old boyfriend from way back when. I doubt any of them would have been thrilled to find out I’d checked their profiles, and needless to say, there was no intention of rekindling anything romantic.

For those who have dabbled in dating apps, it’s common knowledge that there’s a certain level of work involved. This includes exchanging messages, possibly having a chat over the phone, and ultimately deciding to meet up. Fortunately, unsolicited anatomical images, unfortunately prevalent elsewhere, are not typically encountered on Raya.

My communication with others was very limited. I reached out to a few film professionals, but I couldn’t think of anything interesting to ask them. When I inquired about the type of films one director creates, he simply replied, ‘I direct successful films.’

An American director based in the U.S., who seemed quite appealing, proposed meeting during his brief visit to London. However, I was curious, not expecting it to lead to dating. I found celebrities on my screen intriguing – Hollywood stars like Chris Rock and John Mayer, musicians such as yourself, John Mayer, along with British personalities like David Walliams. Yet, none of them seemed interested in me. It feels like they might be seeking something more glamorous than a middle-aged rural working mom of two, or perhaps they’ve stopped using Raya.

As an ardent enthusiast, a comrade graciously let me peek into her premium Raya Plus account – a monthly splurge worth approximately £45. This exclusive platform allows me to peruse multiple profiles at once and know who’s taken a liking to my profile without the usual waiting game for matches. However, there was an intriguing disclaimer about certain profiles being concealed for privacy reasons, leaving me to ponder if perhaps there might be an even more elite VIP tier hidden within this social realm.

After a while, I realized that if you aren’t young, exceptionally attractive, and reside in Los Angeles, New York City, or London, there’s little point. If you have kids and live in the countryside, it’s nearly impossible. Consequently, I chose to leave Raya and sign up for Muddy Matches – a dating platform designed for more mature singles.

Let’s see how that goes.

 Anna Boyd is a pseudonym. Some details have been changed

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2025-01-13 15:18

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