Ben Stiller Set Out to Make a Film About His Parents. He Didn’t Realize It Was About Himself, Too

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Ben Stiller didn’t want to insert himself into his documentary Stiller & Meara: Nothing Is Lost.

The actor and director originally wanted to create a film about his famous parents, comedians Jerry Stiller and Anne Meara, and he was initially hesitant about including himself. However, after showing the movie to friends-it will premiere at the New York Film Festival and then be available in theaters on October 17th and on Apple TV+ on October 24th-he consistently heard they didn’t focus much on him personally.

He realized he had a role to play. 

He realized he needed to rethink his views of his parents, and also how their influence had shaped his own relationships. He shared this during a break from filming the fourth *Meet the Parents* movie.

He realized that to honestly share his parents’ private experiences, he also needed to examine and include his own perspective. He felt it would be unfair to judge them without also being willing to be vulnerable and self-reflective in his filmmaking.

“Stiller & Meara: Nothing Is Lost” is a complex and insightful film about the Stiller family. While it’s largely a loving tribute to Jerry and Anne Stiller and their lasting impact, the film also reveals the real-life strains that sometimes fueled their famous onstage banter through the use of personal recordings Jerry made. Ben Stiller also interviews his wife, Christine Taylor, and their children, Ella and Quin, to explore how his parents’ strengths and weaknesses have shaped him both as a performer and as a person.

Ben Stiller believes that truly getting to know your parents – not just as parents, but as individuals – can offer a fresh outlook on your own life. He found that learning more about them personally increased his understanding and empathy for them.

Following in his father’s footsteps

The film centers around the extensive collection of photos, videos, and personal items Jerry Stiller left behind after his death in 2020, following his wife Anne Meara’s passing in 2015. The movie shows director Ben Stiller and his sister Amy going through these memories as they cleared out their parents’ longtime Upper West Side apartment in preparation for its sale.

However, Stiller was also carefully listening to over 100 hours of recordings his father had created. He found it a unique and moving experience, feeling like he was stepping back in time to relive those moments.

The tapes began as recordings of Jerry and Anne practicing or working on their material. However, Jerry often kept them rolling even when their conversations turned into personal arguments, and some of those arguments are included in the film.

At first, Stiller was taken aback by hearing his parents argue, but those moments gave him a new understanding of their relationship. He realized he could tell the story of their creative collaboration and how it affected their personal lives. This led him to consider how, despite feeling frustrated by their occasional absences when he was growing up, he also became a dedicated workaholic, much like his father-a pattern he now sees in his own parenting.

Finding the root of the relationship

The documentary *Stiller & Meara: Nothing Is Lost* tells the story of how Jerry Stiller and Anne Meara, a Jewish and Catholic couple, became one of the biggest comedy duos in America during the 1960s, eventually landing a regular spot on *The Ed Sullivan Show*. Their children, Amy and Ben Stiller, grew up in the spotlight, appearing on talk shows from a young age as part of their parents’ act.

Throughout the film, Ben Stiller explores his mother’s dream of becoming an actress, highlighting her eventual stage work in plays like *The House of Blue Leaves*, and how his father experienced a career resurgence thanks to *Seinfeld*. However, the documentary doesn’t shy away from difficult topics, honestly portraying his mother’s battle with alcohol and revealing that their 60+ year marriage wasn’t always easy.

Stiller explains he had to imagine how his parents would react, considering their personalities. He aimed to create a portrayal of their relationship in the movie that captured the deep love and care they shared, and felt balanced in representing that connection.

It took Ben Stiller five years to make the film, and during that time, he reconnected with his wife, Christine Taylor, after they had been separated. Eventually, both Taylor and their children were willing to honestly discuss their complicated feelings about Stiller prioritizing his career over family time. The film, *Stiller & Meara: Nothing Is Lost*, also suggests that the world of show business often involves the entire family.

Ben Stiller explains that the movie felt natural for him and his sister, as it mirrored their upbringing. Both grew up immersed in the world of performing arts – his sister even acted alongside their mother in *King of Queens*. He recalls a childhood filled with love for that world, but also acknowledges the sacrifices it meant for their parents. Stiller points out that any truly dedicated artist will inevitably prioritize their work, which often means less time spent with family.

Ben Stiller’s children are now also drawn to careers in entertainment, continuing a family tradition. His daughter, Ella, a Juilliard graduate, will appear in the new season of *The Comeback* after performing off-Broadway. Both of Stiller’s children also had parts in *Happy Gilmore 2*. Stiller acknowledges the film will likely spark discussion about nepotism in Hollywood, but he hopes it will help audiences understand the unique experience of growing up in a family of performers.

Stiller explained that this felt like a true reflection of life and what really matters.

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2025-09-24 18:07