The profound taboo at the heart of the Beckham family feud. Everyone is quietly thinking it – is no one going to say it? asks AMANDA GOFF

by

It might sound like a familiar story, but the falling out between Brooklyn Beckham and his parents feels like a classic Greek tragedy.

That’s not meant to be a clumsy reference to the story about Victoria supposedly dancing on her son at his wedding – at least, that’s what Brooklyn says.

It reminds me of classic fables – stories about family conflict, the dangers of arrogance, and the sacrifices people make in pursuit of success.

However, Brooklyn’s strained relationship with his parents, Victoria and David, reflects a sadly common issue today. It highlights the growing trend of families becoming estranged from one another, a phenomenon particularly prevalent in Western cultures.

Completely cutting off contact with your parents – something once considered a major social violation – is now happening more and more often.

I’m going to be direct: the common sayings that family ties are the most important, that you only have one mother or father, and that children should always love their parents no matter what, are simply untrue.

It’s true that some young adults – heavily influenced by social media and a focus on mental health – quickly cut off contact with their parents without fully understanding the serious and lasting impact it can have.

But I believe they are in the minority.

I suspect many people have given this a lot of thought. Usually, it’s a final attempt to avoid spending their lives trying to make everyone else happy, which often leads to unhappiness.

Just because you’re related to someone doesn’t mean you’re entitled to be in their life, no matter how you behave. Family ties don’t give anyone a free pass.

It seems Posh and Becks – or Lady Victoria and Sir David, as they are now – are finally understanding the fallout from their son Brooklyn publicly sharing very personal and damaging details about their fractured relationship on Instagram.

Despite the unfortunate circumstances, this has been the biggest celebrity scandal we’ve seen in years. It truly shocked me, and I’ve followed these stories for a long time.

On Monday, Brooklyn made serious accusations against his parents, claiming they were overly controlling and had stifled his independence.

The 26-year-old said he was standing up for himself ‘for the first time in his life’.  

He explained that Victoria unexpectedly decided not to make Nicola’s wedding dress at the very last minute. To make matters worse, she then interrupted his first dance with his wife by performing a shocking and unsuitable routine, which he described as one of the most humiliating experiences of his life.

(As an aside, whoever has footage of that must be sitting on a goldmine…) 

Brooklyn shared that she starts each day feeling thankful for the life she’s built and experiencing a sense of calm and contentment.

My wife and I simply want a peaceful, private life, and happiness for our family – away from public attention and any attempts to control us.

This news confirmed long-held rumors that started after the wedding and grew stronger as Brooklyn and Nicola repeatedly skipped important family events, like David’s 50th birthday and his knighting ceremony.

The Beckhams haven’t publicly commented on the situation so far. The only hint of a response came from David Beckham, who mentioned at the World Economic Forum that ‘children are allowed to make mistakes’.

Firstly, Brooklyn is not a child; he is 26. And secondly, this was no mistake.

Cutting ties with family, especially parents, is rarely a sudden decision. It’s usually the result of years of pain and careful consideration. Adult children who reach this point are often exhausted from constantly suppressing their feelings and being told to just deal with problems caused by their parents’ actions.

Brooklyn, barely four months old when his parents’ wedding was featured in OK! magazine, has undoubtedly made numerous attempts to fix things.

He’s definitely had advantages throughout his life because of his family’s reputation. This opened doors for him to try careers as both a photographer and a chef, but unfortunately, he wasn’t successful in either, even with significant financial investment.

However, does that make up for the embarrassment of his mother, at 51 years old, legally owning the rights to his name, ‘Brooklyn Beckham’? It’s strange to think he doesn’t even own his own name.

Does any of this compensate for what he says was a lifetime of being controlled and the constant disrespect his family allegedly showed his wife?

Whether you feel bad for Brooklyn and Nicola or not, it’s fair to say being the eldest Beckham child likely came with a lot of pressure and wasn’t easy.

Growing up as the son of a soccer legend has made it challenging for him to establish his own identity. It’s difficult to pursue your own path knowing you’ll always be compared to your incredibly famous father.

Adding to the disruption, just as he began school, his father’s former assistant, Rebecca Loos, publicly claimed she’d had a relationship with the married soccer player.

It’s really striking to me, the irony of it all. Brooklyn’s always been incredibly devoted to his wife and fiercely protective of their privacy, and that’s actually what’s finally pushed him to stand up to his famous parents. It’s complicated because his dad faced rumors of cheating early in his marriage – rumors he always denied – and his mom practically invited the paparazzi the moment she stepped into the public eye. It’s like his desire for a normal life is the very thing causing this rift, and it’s honestly a bit heartbreaking to watch.

However, by accusing his family of being disingenuous, Brooklyn has also faced backlash. Critics point out that he benefits from privilege and accuse him of simply replacing his controlling mother with an equally demanding wealthy wife.

I’m not one of them.

Even though I’m usually skeptical of celebrities complaining, I actually feel sorry for Brooklyn.

I’m on his side because I’ve walked in his shoes. 

I haven’t spoken to certain family members for nearly twenty years. Unlike some people who share personal issues publicly, I’ve kept this private, even though I generally live a very open life.

I won’t go into specifics, but this has been incredibly difficult and heartbreaking. I’m not pointing fingers, but cutting off family is always a last resort – something you only do when you’ve exhausted all other options.

Although it’s been very painful, going through this has actually given me the peace Brooklyn seems to want.

Although there was no physical violence, I’m relieved to be free from the constant arguments and negativity that were exhausting me.

Everyone keeps telling me I’m making a huge mistake, that I’ll look back on this and be devastated. They say you only get one family, and if I don’t fix things, I’ll regret it forever. Honestly, I just can’t help myself – I’m completely captivated, and they just don’t understand.

Maybe. But I doubt it.

Let’s be real – sometimes, the kindest thing you can do for yourself is to create space – even complete distance – from someone. It’s not always easy to accept, but cutting contact can be the most emotionally healthy path forward. I’ve seen it time and time again with my clients – prioritizing your own well-being often means stepping away.

It’s still a sensitive topic, and admitting you’re estranged from family can be really awkward. People tend to judge either way – if you’re the one who ended contact, you might be labeled as uncaring, and if you’re on the receiving end, others often assume you must have done something seriously wrong to cause that rift.

I sometimes worry people will see me as the bad guy for suggesting that cutting off contact can be a reasonable choice. I realize there are likely parents who really want to rebuild relationships with their kids and might think I’m making things worse.

Actually, family estrangement isn’t a new issue started by Millennials. It happens in all kinds of families – both well-known ones, like the Beckhams, and everyday families like mine – and it’s been happening for a long time. Many people from the Baby Boomer generation also cut ties with their parents, but they generally kept it private, as it was considered shameful to talk about.

What happened with Brooklyn and his family might seem dramatic, but it highlights a sadly common experience. While you may not have gone through family estrangement yourself, it’s likely someone you know has.

I saw parts of my own life in his words. 

I’ve been talking to a lot of people recently who are estranged from their families, and they’ve all expressed the same surprising sentiment: they never imagined they’d find themselves supporting someone like Brooklyn Beckham, but here they are.

His story reminds us that everyone, even those who seem to have it all, experiences challenges and difficulties in life – despite any attempts to present a flawless image.

Read More

2026-01-23 14:05