Why Fans Think Taylor Swift’s The Life of a Showgirl Diss Track ‘Actually Romantic’ Is About Charli XCX

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Taylor Swift. Charli XCX. Matty Healy. George Daniel.

Okay, so if you’re like me and totally obsessed with the theories around The Life of a Showgirl podcast, you’re going to need to get familiar with these names. Basically, everyone’s convinced that the seventh song on Taylor Swift’s new album, “Actually Romantic,” is secretly shading Charli XCX, and understanding *why* requires knowing who’s involved. It’s getting intense, honestly!

“Actually Romantic” seems to be a direct reaction to “Sympathy is a knife,” a song from Charli’s successful 2024 album BRAT. In that song, she described how seeing another pop star made her feel insecure. Because Taylor Swift was dating Matty Healy of The 1975 – a bandmate of Charli’s husband, George Daniel – while The 1975 was touring the year before, many people believe “Sympathy is a knife” was written about Taylor.

“I don’t want to share this space with anyone. I refuse to pretend to be happy. There’s this girl who really gets to me and highlights all my doubts,” Charli sings in the song. “I’m not sure what’s true and what’s just my imagination running wild. It feels like people are laughing at me. George thinks I’m overreacting and says he doesn’t see a problem, but he’s so innocent. I’m ashamed to admit I feel this way, but I desperately want someone to understand. Because I could never be like her, even if I attempted to,” she continues.

Though Taylor Swift and Matty Healy were first rumored to be dating in 2014, it took nearly a decade-and Swift’s six-year relationship with Joe Alwyn-before they reconnected romantically in the spring of 2023. Unfortunately, their relationship only lasted a little over a month before news surfaced of their split, fueled by public backlash over Healy’s past statements and actions. Many of Swift’s fans think she detailed the breakup in the song “The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived” on her 2024 album THE TORTURED POETS DEPARTMENT. Swift is currently engaged to Kansas City Chiefs tight end Travis Kelce, and Healy is engaged to model/actor Gabbriette Bechtel, who is a close friend of Charli’s.

In “Actually Romantic,” Swift hints that Charli’s response to the situation involving her and Healy played a role in inspiring the diss track. The song begins with, “I heard you call me ‘Boring Barbie’ when the coke’s got you brave.” She continues, “High-fived my ex and then you said you’re glad he ghosted me. Wrote me a song saying it makes you sick to see my face.”

Taylor and Charli’s relationship didn’t always appear strained. In 2018, Charli actually opened for Taylor Swift on the Reputation Stadium Tour. But the first hints of problems started in 2019 when Charli discussed wanting to lead her own tour in an interview with Pitchfork.

I’m very thankful that Taylor invited me on that tour. However, as a performer, it often felt like I was performing for very young children,” she explained. “I’ve spent a lot of time opening for other artists, and it really established me as someone who always fights from behind, which I appreciate now. But I’m ready to take control of my own career and do things my way.”

After receiving criticism from Taylor Swift fans, Charli addressed the situation on social media, explaining that she didn’t mean any disrespect and felt “only love” for Taylor. She explained, “In the printed version of a much larger interview, my comments about the tour were summarized into a strange sentence.” She continued, “Before that tour, I had been performing at many 18+ club venues, so playing on stage for audiences of all ages was new. This changed my approach to performing, giving me a different kind of energy-I mostly talked about how amazing it was to open for Taylor, and I’m incredibly thankful for the opportunity and how much I enjoyed performing for a new crowd!” She emphasized that she had played a ton of shows for adults only prior to the tour.

Five years after that, as the release of BRAT approached, Charli shared a message on TikTok clarifying that, aside from “Von Dutch,” she hadn’t written any of the album’s songs to be diss tracks.

She explained that her work explores the difficulties of being an artist, particularly a woman. It’s a world where you’re both competing with others and pressured to be close friends with everyone. “And if you don’t fit that mold, you’re often labeled negatively,” she said. “I think that expectation is just unrealistic.” She added that the songs reflect the emotional rollercoaster of being a female artist-feeling confident one day, incredibly insecure the next, and sometimes even feeling worthless. “It’s a complicated, emotional experience that we’re often discouraged from discussing,” she said. “But these songs address it directly.” She acknowledged she might face criticism for being so open, but concluded, “it’s just the truth.”

Some months later, during an interview with New York Magazine, Charli clearly stated that “Sympathy is a knife” wasn’t about Taylor Swift. She explained, “That song is about my own experiences, my emotions, and my struggles with anxiety. It’s about how my mind builds stories and scenarios when I’m feeling insecure.” She also added, “And how I avoid being in those vulnerable situations when I’m doubting myself.”

Swift also shared her thoughts on the story, highlighting how much Charli has grown as an artist. “I was immediately impressed with Charli’s talent for melodies when I first heard ‘Stay Away’ back in 2011,” she explained. “Her songwriting is consistently unique and imaginative. She has a knack for taking songs in unexpected directions, and she’s been doing that for more than ten years. It’s wonderful to see that dedication and effort rewarded.”

Although Taylor Swift may admire Charli XCX as a professional, the lyrics of her new song hint that Charli might not feel the same way about her. In “Actually Romantic,” Swift sings, “Hadn’t thought of you in a long time, but you keep sending me funny valentines.” She continues, “And I know you think it comes off vicious, but it’s precious, adorable. Like a toy chihuahua barking at me from a tiny purse, that’s how much it hurts. How many times has your boyfriend said, ‘Why are we always talking ’bout her?’”

In a discussion about the song, Swift explained that “Actually Romantic” is about “understanding that someone you know has always seen your relationship as a competition”-a statement many fans believe was a subtle dig at Charli.

You know, as a movie buff, I’ve noticed this pattern – suddenly, someone starts going overboard, and it hits you that you’ve actually been a huge presence in their thoughts without even realizing it. They’ll start hinting at it, maybe even showing resentment or acting like you’re a problem. But honestly, if you flip that around and see it as a weird form of affection – like, ‘Wow, I’ve made such an impact on this person’s life!’ – it’s actually kind of romantic. It’s flattering when you think about it – they’ve built you up to be a big part of their world, even when you weren’t consciously thinking about them. It’s a strange realization, but when you look at it that way, it’s pretty sweet.

The seemingly minor disagreement has created a lot of discussion on social media. Some fans are supporting Charli, while others believe she provoked a response from Swift.

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2025-10-03 22:07