PETER HOSKIN reviews Rematch: Part cartoon, part fashion shoot, it’s blissfully free of sponsorship deals, extra credit card payments… and best of all, there’s no Cristiano Ronaldo

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Rematch (PlayStation, Xbox, PC, £20.99)

Verdict: Golazzo!

Video games have conspired to make the beautiful game ugly. 

Instead of emphasizing the game itself, they’ve shifted football towards sponsorship agreements, extensive financial spreadsheets, and regrettably, numerous additional credit card charges for obtaining exclusive versions of players like Cristiano Ronaldo, dressed in a vibrant green uniform conceptualized by a YouTube content creator.

However, it’s time for Rematch, another game from the makers of martial arts masterpiece Sifu, who are now aiming to bring the charm back to football with their creation.

Some of this is down to its look. 

Just as Sifu, Rematch boasts an appealing animated aesthetic, blending elements of cartoons with high-fashion photography. Unlike other football games, it steers clear of photorealistic depictions, which makes it all the more captivating.

But mostly it’s down to the gameplay. 

Instead of managing an entire team, you’ll be handling only one player in quick, intense games, with others controlling both your teammates and the opposing side.

Instead of describing the first scenario as “It’s you taking the ball, weaving around tackles and aiming into the top corner… goal!”, you could rephrase it more casually as “You’re skillfully dribbling past defenders, finding the back of the net with a precision shot!”

For the second scenario, a more playful way to put it would be: “And here we go again, you’re spooning another attempt high and mighty.

The likelihood of insanity, given that different members act independently, is generally controlled by the number of team members – ranging from small teams of three to larger ones of five.

Imagine a game that’s like Rocket League but with human players instead of cars – it’s almost the same concept!

Unlike Rocket League, however, Rematch’s control system doesn’t quite come naturally. 

Following a brief rundown of the buttons for diverse shots, passes, tackles, and feints, I needed several additional hours just to understand the game’s requirements. That’s when I started to gradually get the hang of it.

Regardless, once you surpass that level of skill – such as deliberately kicking the ball over an outstretched goalkeeper – there is hardly any sensation more gratifying in contemporary sports video games.

And, what’s more, there’s no Ronaldo in sight.

 

Pipistrello And The Cursed Yoyo (PlayStation, Xbox, Switch, PC, £16.75)

Verdict: Delightfully batty

Bats are swift and relatively small creatures, making them quite hard to spot. However, be sure not to overlook this specific bat, as I nearly did so in May.

It was during the launch of Pipistrello and the Cursed Yoyo that both the anticipated Nintendo Switch 2 and the acclaimed Death Stranding 2 hit the market. Despite an abundance of promising titles, I’m not sure if I’ll find many games as enjoyable as these two this year.

Just as in The Legend of Zelda series where the protagonist doesn’t always appear in the game’s title, so too does the main character of Pipistrello and The Cursed Yoyo not have “Pipistrello” explicitly mentioned first in the name.

You play as Pippit, an endearingly oblivious teenage bat who’s obsessed with his yoyo. 

In a scenario where a group of genetically altered beasts assault an energy firm run by his somewhat unscrupulous relatives, it falls upon Pippit to step in and prevent disaster – otherwise face the loss of his allowance.

In other words, it’s not a spin-off of contemporary Zelda games, characterized by their expansive environments and lofty objectives.

As a lifestyle enthusiast, I’d say, “Indeed, Pipistrello reminds me of the classic top-down adventure games from the later Game Boy era, specifically those reminiscent of Zelda. Its graphics have a vibrant, pixelated charm that harks back to those days. The gameplay revolves around upgrading your yoyo for smoother progression through its intricate dungeons.

Instead, these “dungeons” are not the traditional fantasy structures you might imagine from medieval tales. Rather, they refer to places like shopping centers and sports stadiums.

The contemporary urban setting of “Pipistrello” deviates delightfully from the norm within its genre, offering an intriguing landscape to traverse. This world is brimming with peculiar characters, riddles, hidden treasures, and humor that will genuinely make you chuckle.

Some instances, the game’s challenge suddenly becomes quite steep, even dizzying. However, overall, it’s a delightful trip down memory lane with a modern twist. As for Pipistrello 2, that’s just wishful thinking for a bat.

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2025-07-04 02:50