Movies

‘Pee-wee as Himself’ gives Paul Reubens the final word on his identity

BBG News

In Matt Wolf’s documentary titled “Pee-wee as Himself,” which debuts on HBO this Friday, Paul Reubens casually mentions that he was born in 1938 near the Mississippi River in a small house, and his father worked on a steamboat under the name Steamboat Milton. However, it’s important to note that while Paul Reubens is indeed himself, he frequently portrayed the character Pee-wee Herman, making him the sole embodiment of this iconic figure.

The essence of this narrative revolves around the complex dynamics of identity – the struggle between one’s true self, the persona presented, and the image crafted. He yearns for greater recognition, seeks clarity about his own identity, and aspires to share his story: “to make myself more understood,” “to clarify my motivations,” “to address some questions about who I truly am, what my journey has been, and how it all unfolded,” and “to correct a few misunderstandings – that’s about it.” The narrative also carries an infectious charm, reminiscent of Pee-wee Herman, with his ups and downs, adding to its delightful appeal.

Reubens expresses that it seems he shouldn’t have been in charge of making his own documentary. He adds, “I think I’ll emerge from this experience and say, ‘I knew it all along,’ meaning I could have handled directing this documentary.

Television

In the two-part documentary titled ‘Pee-wee as Himself,’ directed by Matt Wolf and airing on HBO this Friday, we get an intriguing look at the life of Paul Reubens, delving into how he hid behind the persona of his famous character.

Without Wolf realizing it, Reubens – who chose to step away from the project after 40 hours of interviews for undisclosed reasons as depicted in the movie – had been battling leukemia for six years prior. Tragically, he passed away in 2023. However, the topic hints at a sense of premonition. “It may sound odd, but death is so definitive that being able to convey your message at the last moment or at some point is remarkable.

To whom does the movie belong? Control is a frequently revisited topic in terms of his work as well as his personal life and what he chose to reveal to the world. Initially, he opted to abandon all his other comedy personas to focus on Pee-wee, and later immersed himself in the character, managing his public affairs solely while dressed up. He had previously made the choice, for the sake of his career, to conceal his homosexuality and ended a relationship that was making him too comfortable: “I was as open as one could be, and then I went back into the closet. I could pass.” (There were “many, many secret relationships.”) These were different times, at least for an actor pursuing mainstream success.

Reubens sometimes appears to be an unyielding interviewee, but given that he consents to 40 hours of discussions, it’s hard to label him as truly uncooperative. There is a playful, almost Pee-wee Herman-like quality in his verbal sparring with Wolf. His dialogue suggests a tendency to tease: “I believe if you disagree with me, then you’re mistaken – no, I don’t really think that – well, maybe I do think that a little bit – no, I don’t, I’m joking. Or am I?” He seems unsure whether he is joking or not, and even he himself appears uncertain about his jesting nature.

Instead of simply confirming a point, this documentary breaks away from the norm. Unlike most celebrity films that are self-glorifying productions by the stars or their estates, this one allows the filmmaker freedom to develop and share personal perspectives about the subject. Although “Pee-wee as Himself” is rich and respectful, it’s still selective, edited, and structured to convey a specific message: “I aim to avoid portraying my story as one of victimhood or ‘the man behind the mask, the tears of a clown.’ I don’t want it to be that.

The movie wasn’t produced by Wolf, and some of the comments could have been omitted from the film. However, they can add depth to the overall portrayal, even though it’s essential to be cautious about overinterpreting them or taking literally what was likely intended ironically.

Entertainment & Arts

70-year-old Paul Reubens, famously recognized as the actor behind the character Pee-wee Herman prior to some incidents affecting his career trajectory, passed away.

The main part consists of depicted history, surrounded by comments from Reubens and his associates like co-stars, family, and friends. It’s the account of an individual determined to show off – from circus camp and shows with Sarasota’s Asolo Repertory Theatre, to California Institute of the Arts, where Reubens unfurled his freak flag (notably, theater department classmates included Katey Sagal and David Hasselhoff; if there’s a significant disclosure in “Pee-wee as Himself”, it’s that the Hoff attended CalArts). Upon graduation, the life of an aspiring actor battling in 1970s Hollywood led him to the Groundlings Theatre on Melrose Avenue, where he conceived and nurtured the character that would become his legacy. The name originated from a miniature harmonica brand and the last name of a schoolmate he knew, and he preferred it because he believed it sounded authentic: “If you were creating a name, wouldn’t you invent a more impressive name than that?

In the grand tradition of old Hollywood rise-to-fame narratives, I’d liken “The Pee-wee Herman Show” journey to that of a star who shone brighter with each passing stage and scene. From humble beginnings at the Groundlings, the show found its footing at the Roxy Theatre, and then burst onto the national stage with an HBO special.

Appearances on David Letterman followed, leading up to a nationwide tour that culminated in the opportunity to make a movie. The cherry on top? A Saturday morning kids’ show – the divine “Pee-wee’s Playhouse.” This wasn’t just a colorful, chaotic haven of diversity and inclusivity; it was a beacon of acceptance before such terms were commonplace.

Even if you were there for this whirlwind ride, the impact and excitement might have faded with time. But let me tell you, he was more than a cult figure – he was an icon adored by all.

“There wasn’t really a moment in the ’80s,” says Reuben, “that it wasn’t super cool to be me.”

Regarding the less favorable aspects, it’s disclosed that as a perfectionist, he might have been challenging to collaborate with, and he could harbor grudges. For instance, when Phil Hartman left “The Pee-wee Herman Show” for “Saturday Night Live,” Paul Reubens commented, “Good for him,” without much enthusiasm, followed by a self-deprecating remark, “I’ll get my violin.”

Reubens expressed regret about the anonymity that contributed to Pee-wee’s success, but at the same time felt underappreciated for his creative input in “Pee-wee’s Big Adventure,” a project he co-created with Hartman and Michael Varhol. He also pointed out an irony – while Pee-wee has a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame, Reubens himself does not. (“A touch of irony… It gives me a place to visit.”)

Reflecting on two incidents that garnered widespread attention, I must admit they shed light not just on those accused, but also the investigators. The first, a charge of indecent exposure in an adult cinema, left me feeling as if my privacy had been compromised, and it was nothing short of devastating. The second, a fabricated accusation of possessing child pornography, hinged on one image from my collection of vintage erotica among the 30,000 items scrutinized. This allegation eventually reduced to a misdemeanor charge for obscenity. While many, perhaps most, or even all fans perceived these incidents as undeserved treatment towards a well-known figure, Reubens shares that he continues to grapple with the repercussions 30 years later.

In the day prior to his passing, Reubens recorded a message. This recording is played as scenes of his garden filled with wildlife unfold. It appears that he had a deep affection for nature, being an avid gardener. The sound of his voice in this recording is noticeably weaker and fatigued compared to his on-screen interviews. He explains the purpose behind the film, which he conceived while still grappling with the misconception that he was a pedophile. “The intention,” Reubens expresses, “was to reveal my true self to people, to show them the pain and difficulty of being falsely accused…to be shunned, feared, or doubted because of unfounded assumptions…I wanted viewers to grasp that not everything is as it seems; where there’s smoke, it may not necessarily mean fire.” Throughout his career, he claims, “everything was rooted in love and my aspiration to bring joy, creativity, and entertainment to everyone, young or old.

Pee-wee Herman’s portrayal in the movie can be likened to a heartfelt ballad; it wouldn’t exist without this connection. Whether Paul Reubens would appreciate it is uncertain – it might resonate, or it might not. However, the film offers an enlightening journey into the life and career of an individual who kept many aspects private for years, but eventually chose to open up about some parts of his personal and professional life, revealing fascinating insights.

In Reuben’s life story, I believe there lies a message that resonates with his “Playhouse” broadcast: Be creative, be bold, stay true to who you are. Not everyone might appreciate or understand you, and life won’t always be a smooth sail. But imagine if we were all the same? Life would certainly lose its charm.

Read More

2025-05-23 13:31

Previous post ASICS Readies the GEL-NYC in “White/Cement Grey”
Next post Ballerina: The Action-Packed John Wick Spinoff Everyone’s Raving About!