Liam Payne’s serious childhood trauma and why having a baby so young with Cheryl couldn’t bring the stability that may have saved him: KATIE HIND
As I read through this heart-wrenching narrative, I can’t help but feel a deep sense of sorrow and empathy for Liam Payne. It seems that fame and fortune were not enough to shield him from the demons that haunted him since his lost, tormented youth.
In September of 2011, I received a call from Sony Music’s headquarters in west London, where I was scheduled to meet the rising sensation of Britain’s boy bands.
Previously, about half a year ago, a group of eager teens tried out for the ITV X Factor talent competition. Notably, music mogul Simon Cowell assembled them into a band known as One Direction.
The fledgling stars had already attracted a global fanbase in the millions: a juggernaut that was drawing comparisons to 1960s Beatlemania, even though they had yet to release a song.
From now on, things were set to shift. The band’s first single, titled “What Makes You Beautiful,” was scheduled for release the very next week, and I was all set to conduct interviews with the talented musicians responsible for it.
Initially, they appeared as innocent and youthful when we crossed paths at Fountain Studios in Wembley, during their X Factor performances the year prior. However, I assumed that, with their increasing fame, these budding teenagers would exhibit a sense of self-importance.
How wrong I was.
Upon my arrival, I was met by a group of five well-mannered young gentlemen, all looking quite dashing. However, one individual caught my eye with his adorable curls and engaging, chatty demeanor.
To clarify, it wasn’t Harry Styles, the former One Direction member who has built an enduring solo career, but Liam Payne whom I had the pleasure of meeting. He greeted me affectionately in a casual navy hoodie and jeans, and with a robust Wolverhampton accent, he warmly introduced me to his bandmates – Styles, Louis Tomlinson, Niall Horan, and Zayn Malik.
At just 18, Liam appeared to be far older, and he shared with me his deep longing for his mother Karen’s homemade dishes. In fact, he was eating pre-heated chicken nuggets from the microwave as a substitute.
Since he was constantly moving from one hotel to another without a permanent home, he sought advice from me on how to iron clothes, admitting that he hadn’t mastered the skill yet – and mentioned that he often spent his spare time engrossed in gaming consoles like Nintendo.
He admitted that he had practised putting his hands behind his back and trying to sing like his hero Liam Gallagher, the snarling Oasis frontman. ‘I probably looked a bit stupid though,’ he said.
Apart from expressing fondness for other topics, he often reminisced about West Bromwich Albion, a football club he’s been a fan of since his childhood years. Unfortunately, due to busy schedules, he can’t attend matches in person anymore.
Liam mentioned to me that he tends to prefer more reserved and soft-spoken girls, but it’s interesting to note that he fell in love with Leona Lewis, the winner of X Factor 2006. Additionally, he found singer Tulisa Contostavlos very attractive.
In essence, he appeared to be an unsuspecting traveler – almost like a youngster – whose delicate spirit seemed ill-suited for the harsh, competitive music industry.
Over time, I’ve crossed paths with Liam numerous times at professional gatherings and by mere coincidence – and I consistently found myself harboring a troubling feeling that beneath his facade, he was, in some aspects, an unguarded young spirit yearning to be found.
13 years after our initial conversation, it was impossible for me to foresee the tragic circumstances under which Liam would pass away. After a prolonged period marked by turmoil, scandal, substance abuse, and ultimately his demise.
For quite some time, his struggle with addiction has unfolded, both openly and privately – exacerbated by a delicate emotional condition.
Despite numerous attempts by others to assist him in breaking free from the harmful substances that were ruining his life, it seemed fruitless: after his demise at Buenos Aires’s luxurious CasaSur hotel on Wednesday night, signs of suspected cocaine and heroin equipment were discovered in his damaged room, complete with a shattered TV and half-empty flutes of champagne.
Unfortunately, his life ended in a dismal manner, as one of the world’s most beloved young celebrities. His fans, known as ‘Directioners’, were so devoted that he felt compelled to have a large security team accompany him whenever he left the hotel (although it should be noted that some of his former bandmates, including the globally renowned artist Styles, often travel without such extensive entourages).
What led him down this path, and how did the cheerful young lad I encountered long ago, with his raw edges, end up in such a tragic state?
Beyond any question, he faced greater challenges than his fellow band members when it came to handling the initial fame and infamy that exploded upon them.
At the 2014 Brit Awards, Liam confided in me that he struggled with not being able to go incognito among crowds. The demanding touring schedule and extended periods away from home had worn him down.
It was frequently expressed by him, as I learned from one of his friends later, that he regretted not having attended university, much like several of his classmates did.
Indeed, Liam found himself living a life far beyond what his peers from St. Peter’s Collegiate, his Church of England high school in Wolverhampton, could ever have envisioned.
Regardless of his constant drug use, extensive real estate holdings, frequent trips on private aircraft, love for designer clothing and lavish hotel living, it was believed that he had millions in his account at the time of his death.
Despite his concerns about having achieved peak success too early, there were still many years left for him – plenty of time to evolve into a happy father for Bear, his son born to Cheryl Tweedy, the Girls Aloud star. His friends and family hoped he could find contentment in this role.
However, Liam’s tranquil, angelic visage concealed a past marred by severe childhood trauma: a specter that he believed he would never be able to outrun, and about which the Mail opted to withhold specifics.
A friend shared with me: ‘Prior to embarking on his entertainment career, he harbored demons stemming from his early life. He grappled with these issues and never truly moved past them. Despite being in a band with four others, having the freedom to choose any woman, and making millions, he found it difficult to derive pleasure from any of it.’
Without a doubt, among all One Direction bandmates, it was clearly Liam who appeared to be the least at ease with his celebrity status and wealth.
I usually run into him every few years at The BRIT Awards. In the beginning, he’d quickly come over to greet me, frequently recalling his pleasure from my engaging him with “interesting questions” during our initial interview.
Over time, his disorderly lifestyle started to take a toll on him, making his behavior increasingly erratic.
At an exclusive Brit Awards party held by his record label in February 2013, located at the swanky Arts Club in Mayfair, I witnessed him, clearly the most disheveled of his bandmates, dancing inebriatedly.
In December, I ran into him at the Kurt Geiger shoe store in Canary Wharf, which is located in East London. At that time, he was purchasing a pair of boots as a Christmas gift for his girlfriend, Sophia Smith – a childhood sweetheart of his.
Two years ago, he exuded a casual, carefree attitude, but now, he appeared surprisingly timid. He shared that he purchased a luxurious penthouse in the Docklands, and upon my request, he allowed a photo with me before hurriedly leaving.
Just a short while ago, Liam finished an exhausting global tour with One Direction, which was already one of the most celebrated pop bands ever, having sold approximately 70 million albums under Simon Cowell’s supervision.
Back in 2013, during the Take Me Home tour, we were fortunate enough to catch a show almost every other day – 124 times, to be exact! From February to November, it was one concert after another. And as much as I’d love to believe that our idol Liam Gallagher could handle this non-stop pace, he often confided that he just yearned for a taste of normalcy, longing to escape the spotlight and live life like any other person.
Of course, the fame came with perks – women chief among them. Liam’s best-known romance was with Cheryl, who was ten years his senior, which had begun in 2016 following her split from her French husband Jean-Bernard Fernandez-Versini.
In a span of just six months since they went public with their relationship, this duo had everyone in the entertainment industry buzzing – and then, just half a year later, Cheryl announced that she was carrying their child.
For Liam, the pregnancy came as an immense surprise – he claimed to have confided in his friends that he wasn’t yet prepared for fatherhood.
1D, who went on an indefinite break in 2016, wasn’t anticipating to start his solo venture or becoming a father, particularly to someone ten years senior to him. Instead, those roles were unexpected additions to his life plan.
He shared with his friends that it seemed to him that Cheryl, who was 33 when Bear was born, may have exploited him in order to have a child.
In 2017, when Bear turned seven, Cheryl started feeling increasingly frustrated as she found herself at home taking care of the newborn while Liam was frequently traveling.
Liam was traveling globally for his music promotion, as a friend mentioned. He found himself in a similar situation to what Cheryl experienced a decade ago with Girls Aloud, which sparked intense arguments.
Initially, he opted for private flights to save time returning home, yet this wasn’t sufficient. Cheryl yearned for a genuine family setup, which Liam, still quite young at around 20 years old, was unable to provide. Matters deteriorated significantly and became tumultuous.
Ultimately, they parted ways, allowing Liam more opportunity to veer off course, as a past colleague of his put it.
Though they were coparenting, Cheryl fervently wished for a powerful father-son relationship between Liam and Bear, in spite of his struggles with addiction.
‘Cheryl knew what a state he was in,’ says a source. ‘She wished she could make it better.’
Additionally, it wasn’t just her who desired this; numerous individuals who were near to Liam shared the same hope. As Liam transitioned from a jovial adolescent into a troubled, enraged young adult, several of his closest companions attempted – yet failed – to save him.
Multiple supervisors let him go because of his unpredictable actions and frequent absences from scheduled work events.
Last September (2017), Cheryl, Liam, and their son, Bear, took a lavish vacation to the beautiful island of Majorca as a birthday gift for Liam. However, during their stay, Liam had an accident after getting intoxicated.
As the years went on, he only got worse.
2022 found me, an over-the-moon fan, witnessing an unusual spectacle at a Hollywood post-Oscars bash – my idol Liam seemed to be under the influence of something otherworldly. A video that spread like wildfire, for all the wrong reasons, showed him adopting a peculiar LA accent, replacing his Wolverhampton charm with something unrecognizable.
A friend of Liam’s contacted me in alarm, expressing their concerns that he wasn’t doing well. Previously, Liam shifted residence to a vast mansion close to Chalfont St Giles, Buckinghamshire, to distance himself from London’s temptations and be near Bear, who resides with Cheryl nearby.
Instead, According to my neighbors, it appears he has carried his issues with him. They frequently noticed him arriving home late at night, driven by chauffeurs, accompanied by women.
Although it was said that he attempted to visit Bear often, his erratic lifestyle frequently prevented such meetings. Primarily, Cheryl had to raise the young boy on her own, with significant assistance from her mother Joan.
Liam’s fresh residence was situated nearby an individual often referred to as his benefactress, none other than Denise Lewis, a champion Olympic heptathlete who won the gold medal.
For several years, Steve Finan, her husband, collaborated closely with Liam, and they stood by him during some of his toughest periods, which included a strained relationship with Cheryl.
He would often stay at their home as they battled to keep him sober.
‘Liam adored Denise,’ says a source. ‘She mothered him and really tried to support him.’
More recently, it’s become apparent that his life has been unraveling. His partner, Maya Henry, aged 23, has taken legal action by sending a ‘cease and desist’ letter to him, alleging constant harassment from the star, not only towards her but also her close associates.
Liam’s friends claimed he was angry and upset with her, implying that her actions were a strategy to promote her recently published book.
Just last week, I heard that Liam got into a massive argument with his manager regarding his upcoming album. Unfortunately for him, the release of the album was postponed, as it was considered too pop-oriented by his manager, which made Liam extremely upset.
According to a source, there was a heated argument, causing the album release to be postponed once more. The accompanying single failed to gain traction, leading to some apprehension. Regardless of the difficulties, Liam strongly identified as a musician and yearned for the album’s release.
To make matters even worse, just a few days ago Liam’s record label dropped him.
According to another report, people urged him to seek assistance and recommended attending Alcoholics Anonymous or Narcotics Anonymous gatherings. However, he declined their offers.
His most recent girlfriend was Texan model Katie Cassidy, whom he thought might have been The One. She too had tried to help him, but left Argentina to return to the US two days before he died.
‘Lots of people cared for Liam,’ said a source. ‘He had so much love around him.’
Yet all the love in the world was not enough to rescue this desperately unhappy young man, who for all his fame and fortune could never escape the demons that haunted him from his lost, tormented youth.
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2024-10-18 00:07