2026: A Financial Farce or a Gilded Apocalypse?

Rather than dallying with the trivialities of market gossip, our sage, McGlone, trains his gaze upon the grand tapestry of policy tightening, suppressed volatility, and asset valuations stretched thinner than a society matron’s patience. What a spectacle it promises to be!

Nifty Gateway: Good Riddance?

The whole thing feels…predictable. Like discovering your sourdough starter has developed sentience and is quietly judging your life choices. They’re calling it a “withdrawal-only mode,” which sounds less like a graceful exit and more like a digital hospice. You can now, if you dare, attempt to extract your USD, ETH, or those incredibly valuable (citation needed) NFTs. Just follow the emailed instructions. I’m assuming those instructions involve a complex series of passwords, two-factor authentication, and a vague feeling of dread.