Celebrating Never Have I Ever’s Nalini Vishwakumar, an exemplary depiction of motherhood

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In the popular Netflix series Never Have I Ever, Dr. Nalini Vishwakumar (played by Poorna Jagannathan) isn’t portrayed as a flawless mother. This is immediately apparent when she scolds her daughter, Devi (Maitreyi Ramakrishnan), for nearly dropping her geometry book – a book that had just been blessed by a priest.

She scolded, explaining that if the item fell on the ground, she’d have to return it to the priest, and she didn’t have time to make the trip to Rancho Cucamonga today.

Okay, so it looks like Devi’s life is all bright and fun at 15, but honestly, watching her mom, I felt so much for her. She was clearly stretched super thin, trying to do everything, and had these really high expectations for Devi. It’s no wonder she didn’t have a lot of patience left – you could tell she was running on empty, and with everything they were dealing with, I totally get why!

The first season of Never Have I Ever is more than a typical teen story; it begins at a difficult time for the Vishwakumar family, as they grieve the loss of their husband and father, Mohan (Sendhil Ramamurthy).

The show centers on a teenage girl dealing with the typical challenges of high school, all while grieving the loss of her father. Alongside her struggles, the series also subtly portrays her mother’s journey as a newly single parent, and the pain she feels not only from losing her husband and best friend, but also from the difficulty of truly connecting with her daughter.

From the moment we’re introduced to Nalini, you can feel the strained relationship she has with Devi. While Jagannathan is very funny, his humor doesn’t overshadow the underlying discomfort between them.

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I always felt Nalini really loved Devi, but it was so sad to see how Jagannathan’s own worries kept getting in the way. He was constantly anxious and frustrated, and honestly, I think he was scared of Devi being… well, different. He worried she wasn’t reaching her full potential, but even more than that, he seemed to doubt himself as a mom, like he didn’t know how to raise a child who wasn’t quite like him.

It was strikingly obvious that she had a thriving career as a dermatologist, but her personal life was falling apart.

Nalini feels the same anxieties as any caring mother – questioning if she’s doing a good enough job and if she’s meeting her child’s needs. But she also puts immense pressure on herself to be perfect, which makes those worries even harder to bear.

You know, playing through the story, it wasn’t always obvious, because Devi was constantly making these huge messes for herself – sometimes with a little help from Ben, honestly! But looking back, it was always there: Nalini really tried to be a good mom, she genuinely wanted the best for her kids, and you could see her struggling with that a lot.

The show Never Have I Ever beautifully portrays both Devi’s journey of growing up and Nalini’s experience of becoming a mother. Nalini isn’t just navigating single parenthood; she’s also learning to be kind to herself and embrace change. Throughout this process, she realizes there’s no place for striving for an impossible standard of perfection.

The show Never Have I Ever beautifully illustrates that there’s no single ‘right’ way to be a mother. Every woman’s experience is unique, but we all face similar challenges, constantly pushing ourselves to do our best while feeling judged and scrutinized.

Nalini might have seemed to demand perfection from Devi, but that’s likely because she felt pressured to be perfect herself. When Devi struggled, Nalini saw it as a sign of her own shortcomings.

Honestly, playing as Nalini was tough. Her daughter, Devi, was a total rebel – she just wouldn’t listen and kept breaking all the rules. It was really stressing Nalini out, and without Mohan around to help, they were drifting apart. But thankfully, that wasn’t how their story ended. It wasn’t about a broken family; there was more to it than that.

It’s hard to pinpoint when Nalini understood what Devi needed from a mother – what being a ‘good mother’ truly meant for her specifically.

The relationship improved gradually, through a series of small, gentle moments that allowed them to begin healing. While they had intense arguments filled with hurtful words, these clashes actually brought them closer. The pain forced them to confront their underlying issues, insecurities, and fears, ultimately revealing honest feelings that had been hidden for too long.

Nalini helped Devi grow into a strong young woman by accepting her as she was and nurturing her existing qualities, rather than trying to mold her into someone else. She focused on supporting the child Devi was, not the child she had imagined she would be.

Nalini helped Devi develop her self-assurance, channel her intense energy, and strengthen her ambition. By guiding Devi, Nalini also grew as a person herself.

She strived to be a mother who truly listened before jumping to conclusions. She learned to set aside her own emotions and respond with empathy, like the time she abandoned her rule against dating to support her child through a difficult breakup.

She learned to control her quick temper, which could sometimes be as fierce as Devi’s, allowing her to guide with instruction rather than resorting to punishment or scolding.

She intentionally became more gentle and understanding, creating a secure environment for Devi. She wanted her daughter to feel safe enough to make mistakes, knowing her mother would always support her.

Nalini taught us that there’s no such thing as a perfect mother. Instead, we should focus on continuously getting to know our children, embracing their unique qualities, and growing as individuals alongside them. It’s about learning with our children, not striving for an impossible ideal.

Jagannathan deserves just as much praise as Nalini for portraying such a realistic, complex, and beautifully flawed depiction of motherhood, and for doing so with humor.

Nalini wasn’t perfect, but she constantly worked to become who Devi needed her to be, reinventing herself repeatedly. And we believe tennis great John McEnroe would say she did an amazing job.

Never Have I Ever seasons 1-4 are available to stream now on Netflix.

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2026-03-21 11:20